WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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