Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
