Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
