Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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