I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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