She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
