I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
The Olympian is in my bed
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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