ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize