so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
