hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
