I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Randomize
