Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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