Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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