Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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