I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
