Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
