i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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