At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
