At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
