Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Randomize
