I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Randomize
