we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Randomize