you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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