I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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