I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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