I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
