So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
