the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Randomize
