I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
