His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
