I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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