Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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