i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
