I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
