Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
