I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize