She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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