i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
