So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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