i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
