No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize