where does the pee come out of this thing
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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