Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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