"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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