you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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