yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
