your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
