i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
