your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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