he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
third nipple confirmed
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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